A Moment to Be : Creating space for reflection· November 2026
I recently spent four days in Spain with three peers. A retreat of sorts, but with no set agenda or specific exercises.
The one clear purpose was that each of us would have space to share something we were working on, such as an idea, a concept, a business or a challenge, and ask for insights, feedback and support. The rest of the group would question, coach and support.
I was reminded of just how powerful creating that space can be. Time to reflect, to think out loud, to have your thinking challenged and to hear a different perspective.
And how valuable it is to have the courage to be open and vulnerable with peers. To share something that isn’t fully formed, or something you’re finding difficult, without feeling you need to have the answer.
There was so much insight and learning in those conversations, and clear actions that came from them. Making time to explore something together helped sharpen our thinking and see possibilities we might not have seen on our own.
It left me thinking about how often we make space like this in our everyday lives. Space to pause and reflect, and to ask for the support of people whose perspectives we value. We often fill our days while leaving little room to make sense of them. Yet that space can change how we approach everything else.
Why space to think makes a difference
It can feel indulgent to stop and reflect when there is so much to do. The research suggests otherwise.
In a field study at a call centre in India, researchers asked new employees to spend the last 15 minutes of each training day writing about what they had learned. By the end of training, they scored 22.8% higher on their final assessment than colleagues who simply kept working. Those who also spent five minutes explaining their reflections to a colleague did better still, scoring 25% higher.1 A small amount of time, used to make sense of experience, made a real difference.
Thinking things through with others has a long history in leadership development. In the 1940s, Reg Revans developed what became known as action learning: small groups of peers working on real problems, helping each other mainly through questions rather than advice. He summed it up as L = P + Q: learning comes from programmed knowledge plus questioning insight.2 Our days in Spain were, in many ways, an informal version of this.
Researchers Polly Parker, Douglas Hall and Kathy Kram describe peer coaching as a relationship “in which two people of equal status actively participate in a process of helping each other.”3 The word that stands out for me is equal. There is no expert in the room, just people willing to think alongside one another.
None of this works without trust. Amy Edmondson’s research on psychological safety, the shared belief that a group is safe for interpersonal risk-taking, found that in a study of 51 work teams, the teams that felt safer were more likely to engage in learning behaviours such as asking for help, seeking feedback and talking about mistakes.4 Sharing something unfinished takes courage, and it takes the right kind of space.
Three ways to create space this month
Book fifteen minutes with yourself
Put a short, recurring slot in your diary at the end of the week. Use it to write down what went well, what you learned and what you would do differently. Treat it as you would a meeting with someone you respect.
Find your thinking partners
Invite two or three peers you trust to meet once a month, in person or online. Each person brings one question they are working on. A simple structure helps: ten minutes to share, fifteen minutes of questions from the others (questions, not advice), and five minutes to name one next step.
Share something before it is finished
Choose one idea or challenge you have been keeping to yourself until it feels ready, and talk it through with someone whose perspective you value. Notice what becomes clearer when you say it out loud.
How coaching can help
Coaching offers this kind of space by design: protected time to think out loud with someone whose only focus is your thinking. A coaching conversation is not about being told what to do. It is about being asked the questions that help you see your situation more clearly, notice what matters most, and decide what you want to do next.
If you would like to explore what that space could look like for you, I would be glad to hear from you at [email protected].
Warm wishes,
Adrienne O’Hare
To Be Coaching
References
- Di Stefano, G., Gino, F., Pisano, G. and Staats, B. (2014). Learning by Thinking: How Reflection Aids Performance. Harvard Business School Working Paper 14-093. Summary
- Revans, R. (1980). Action Learning: New Techniques for Management. London: Blond & Briggs. Overview
- Parker, P., Hall, D. T. and Kram, K. E. (2008). Peer coaching: A relational process for accelerating career learning. Academy of Management Learning & Education, 7(4), 487–503.
- Edmondson, A. (1999). Psychological safety and learning behavior in work teams. Administrative Science Quarterly, 44(2), 350–383. PDF
